Tuesday, April 10, 2012

God, melt this heart of stone...




How did I 
   get here? 

To a place
    where
I have become
  impatient, 
& almost cold
  towards
        others? 

While there 
  is no 
excuse for
   such 
a thing, 

 I am able 
    to trace
the steps 
  that 
 brought 
     me here... 

I feel as 
     though
 I am 
     learning
how to 
  interact 
      with people 
all over 
   again... 

I am a 
     people 
person, 

   I am 
      energized 
 by interacting
    with people... 

By nature, 
   I am 
a very 
    compassionate
& loving person... 

  One who 
      loves to 
listen
  to what 
         others 
have to 
   say... 

However, 
   after Africa
was placed
       on my 
heart, 

   and I 
 became more
      and more 
involved 
        and 
           aware, 

It became 
     difficult
to even 
       function
or interact
   with 
      people

who couldn't 
    even 
      fathom
the things 
  I had come
 to know

 or those 
    that 
could not 
     conceive of 
a world
    outside 
their
   own... 

 This 
    distanced 
me from 
    people,

and 
   over time, 
   
my patience
      in dealing
with such
        people
diminished... 


         I have
  an impeccable
 ability
     to
   discern 
        people's 
character, 
   their hangups, 
etc. 

    it is
       both 
a blessing
  and 
    a curse...

       Over time, 
 it has 
    caused
me 
    to completely 
write people 
off, 
 [subconsciously]
instead of 
     choosing
to invest 
    time
in them... 

   I talked 
       to my 
mom 
   about 
this, 
    and she 
said, 
    "that is 
   also 
common
       when 
you are 
   forced to 
deal 
   with certain
kinds of 
      people"...

Thankfully, 
    a friend
of mine
     had the 
courage 
    to mention
this to
     me, 
and that 
   by God's 
grace, 
  I was able 
to hear 
    her
& be 
    receptive 
 to it
and see 
     the need 
 for 
   change. 

   I am 
not that 
     person... 

Everyone
   is unique
& valuable;

everyone you 
       meet
has something
       to teach you;

and everyone
     needs 
to feel 
       validated. 


Christ knows
   the 
     character
of every man
   and yet
he loves
      every man

unconditionally
       &
      equally... 

   How dare
I do 
   anything 
          less, 
as I am 
      just as 
 flawed
     as the 
next person? 

 God, 
    forgive me
for 
   not loving
the way 
      I should.

Fill me
   with 
your love
     until
I am 
   overflowing
with 
   kindness, 
         compassion, 
patience, 
          forgiveness, 
  understanding,
peace, 
     and joy.  

May they 
     know
you 
   through
your love
     in me. 
           Amen.  




   



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